To My Sisters.

Being in a Greek organization isn't everything.  Some people love it a too much, and some people hate it.  I have been right in between.  Being in a sorority was a great decision for me because I only knew 2 people at Ole Miss when I came here.  I met more people than I ever would have had I not joined a sorority.  It is not "paying to make friends."  It is a venue through which to make the best friends of your life.

Dear Sisters,
 I didn't get to say everything I wanted to last night.  I was nervous, just like on bid day.  I only knew one person in our pledge class.  Now I know all of you.

How would I have ever gotten through the last four years without y'all?  You held my hand when I was sad, and made me laugh when I thought I would never laugh again.  How have we managed to go from strangers to best friends in a few short years?  I didn't know anyone and now I know everyone.  How did that happen so quickly and successfully?

I think the most fun I've ever had was Sophomore year living in the dorm with all of you.  We definitely made the best out of that building we had to live in.  I will always remember how wonderfully sweet everyone was to me when I was laid up in bed with mono.  I loved having so many of you come into my room to talk and laugh and cry with me for hours.  Nothing will ever compare to that year.  We had so much fun.

The summer after Sophomore year was as good as it gets.  We had no fear, as we do now.  We were still so young and hopeful, but didn't really know it.  To us, life was going out at night and laying by the pool by day.  What a nice time that was.  We were so full of life.

When Susan died, we all felt the same heartbreak.  It was amazing how such a huge group could all feel the same way.  Exactly the same way.  None of us could breathe or eat or sleep or think.  We held on to each other for dear life.  I might have lost my mind if I hadn't been around you lovely girls for one of the darkest times in my life.  We pulled each other up when we felt we couldn't go on.  Instead of criticizing each other for the way that we coped, we shared an unspoken understanding.  The pain in our eyes was constant, and could be seen from one girl to another, to another.  By the end of last year, Junior year, we picked ourselves up and began to start our lives over.

One of the greatest things about us is that we support one another.  I support each and every one of you. I truly hope that you will find happiness in your life.  I hope you will be successful in every facet of your life.  I pray that none of us will face another crippling loss as we have before, but we all know that there will be more loss and sadness in the world.  I hope you are happy more than you are sad.  I hope one day we can all think and talk about Susan without crying.  I hope you will all have big beautiful families that make you proud.  I hope you find love and hold on tight.

We all try to live by Susan's example daily- I know this.  Sometimes we lose sight of what is important, especially during this confusing time in our lives.  Let's remember one another, what we have been through, and what we love about one another.  Let us not forget all the laughter that we have shared.  I hardly can remember what we have laughed about these years, but I do remember my muscles aching from smiling and laughing so hard.  What a wonderful feeling.

At the end of these perfect four years, I am thankful that God put each of us in the same sorority at the same time.  Susan was the angel that brought us together, I am sure of that.  She and God, together, brought us to one another.  I am thankful every day that I have been so blessed to get to know each and every one of you, and your individually special talents.  We are each put on this Earth to do something amazing.  Though I haven't figured out my exact purpose yet, many of you have.  I know you will make the world a better place, as you already have.  My world thanks you and cherishes your loving light.

I love you.

THE BEST DAY EVER!

What a day it has been today.  I am so happy!!  Things started out a little shaky when I woke up and realized my printer was out of ink as I had a paper due today.  While printing my paper (after going to Walgreens TWICE then finally Office Depot) I got an email from a company.  Yes, it's true.  This is an amazing company that is for people interested in people teaching in private schools.  It's quite difficult to be accepted (and I was rejected my first try) BUT I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!  Basically this company, gets your references, resume, and the likes and sends it to schools you have indicated you might be interested in.  You must tell them TONS of different information about yourself like what kind of subject/grade you might be interested in teaching, where you would like to be geographically, and your work experience.  I'm so excited that my life is FINALLY going somewhere.  My prayers have been working.  :)

MUSHY ALERT

Today is mine and the boyfriend's TWO YEAR anniversary!  I can't believe it's been two years.  It feels like so much longer- a lifetime even.  Two years ago today we went on our first date.  Jake called me to see if I would like to go see Frost/Nixon with him, because we had talked about wanting to see it in the class we had together.  I was SO nervous.  I mean, I was just freaking out.  I needed some sort of sedation.  It had been so long since I had gone on a date, especially with a guy that I really liked.  We went to the movie theater and we were the only ones in there.  It seems unbelievable but it's all the truth.  We didn't even watch the movie.  We talked the entire time.  It was the best first date of all time.  The best part?  We made each other laugh.

Since then, we have been through just about everything together.  We have been happy together, sad together, grieving together, excited together, anxious together, scared together... and just about everything in between.  Now, I'm not trying to say that we have the perfect relationship because there is no such thing.  We fight, just like every couple.  What's different about us is that we learn from our mistakes, make constructive changes, and most importantly, we have grown together.

The past two years have been some of the most important years of my life.  Jake has made my life better, he has enhanced my life, he has made me a happier person- just like a relationship should be.  A wonderful supplement to an already gifted life.

Every day I am amazed by how lucky Jake and I have been.  It is amazing to me how we were brought together... by angels.  We had a class together freshman year.  I noticed him, but he didn't notice me.  He always spoke in class and he intrigued me.  I asked a friend about him at a fraternity party one night.  Then we had yet another class together.  He sat next to me.  After a few weeks in the class, I asked him if he had gone to the date party the night before.  He had.  Yes, it's true.  I spoke to him first.  After talking in class for a few weeks, he started walking me to my next class.  He explains this saying, "I felt a magnetic pull to you.  I needed to be with you.  So I walked with you."

One night we were at the same restaurant for two different birthday parties.  Susan's boyfriend was in the same fraternity and I told her about my very small crush.  She told her boyfriend.  Her boyfriend told Jake.  "Don't mess this up, man," he said.  We talked but we were going to two different bars that night.  I ended up going to the same bar as him because my friends and I didn't want to pay a cover (typical).  We talked all night long.  He bought me all my drinks and only left my side to go to the bathroom.  He had me.  After I went home, he sent me a text, I'll never forget it, "You looked spectacular tonight in the red."  How could I resist?

The next day he skipped class.  I was so nervous he didn't want to see me!  But then he called.  He was "so hungover" and wanted to know what we had done in class.  He asked me if I was going to the field party on Saturday.  I said I was.  "I'll see you there," he said.

We spent the whole day together, playing a game of witty banter.  He poured a beer on my head and I couldn't help but laugh.  He helped my drunk friend find her way home.  What a guy, he was/is/will be forevermore.

That Sunday he asked me on the date.  I am the luckiest girl in the whole world.  I have never been so happy in my life.  I am so in love with him on so many levels.  We understand one another without having to speak.  We were brought together by an angel.  Susan knew we were supposed to be together. She was right.

Two years and counting...

Dr. Seuss.

Happy birthday Dr. Seuss!  


Thank you for enriching our lives with rhyme and memorable characters.  Did you know that Dr. Seuss was rejected 43 times before he was finally published?  This give hope to any and every writer out there.  Dr. Seuss was a genius, and that's a fact.  


My short story teacher said that his first line of How the Grinch Stole Christmas is the greatest first line ever written: "Every Who down in Who-ville liked Christmas a lot...But the Grinch, who lived just north of Who-ville, did NOT!"  This is the best first line because it tells us our characters, gives us a conflict, and gives us time to resolve that conflict.  


Thank you, Dr. Seuss, for giving us the Grinch, Horton, Sam I am, and all the other timeless characters.  I hope to one day be half the writer that you were.

The Beauty of YouTube

This just blew my mind!!!!  Enjoy. meow.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hngBzDDyFE&feature=aso

All the Different Seniors.

Senior year of college is almost the complete opposite of the last senior year I experienced: senior year of high school.  Senior year was filled with anxiety but a very different kind than I am feeling now, it was more like excitement.  Let's time travel...

4 long but not so faraway years ago, I was a mere child of 18.  I was in love, my first love.  I had nothing to worry about, even though I thought I had the world on my shoulders.  I had great friends, and a mind that wasn't even close to reaching capacity.  I thought I was the princess of all the lands, and had the attitude to show it.  I had no worries.  I had decided on going to Ole Miss in November of my senior year and had found a roommate, who bailed on me in May.  I had everything lined up for school, rush, and living away from my parents.  I had it all figured out.

WRONG.

Sad, but true.  College life was a bit more difficult than I anticipated, but I adjusted.  Now, let's hop back in the DeLorean and travel to today.  Today.  Today.  Well, listen to this.  I was supposed to discover whether or not I got into graduate school (the only one I really applied to) on April first.  Well, I just found out I won't get an answer until April 15th, which is my sister's birthday.  I graduate May 14th.  You do the math on that one.

So, in comparison to my senior year of high school, I have no clue where I'm going to be next year, mentally, emotionally, physically.  I am in love, but with a different boy, and a different kind of love.  One that is more than just hormones.  I do have many, many friends but we are all going to disperse next year.  How will we hang on?  Some days I feel like I have reached my mental and intellectual capacity and there is no more room.  Then, I read something that completely blows my mind, and I feel like a freshman again.  One who knows nothing.

The good news is I have a mind full of ideas.  Why does every single job I think I might be just great at, have to have at least 5 years experience?  Riddle me that.  I KNOW that I am and could be the best at that job, but I'm not even given a chance because I'm a recent college graduate.  Why is this?  It doesn't make sense.

Other good news: I have a lifetime full of family and friends that are constantly lifting me up and reminding me that I can do whatever it is that I'm dreaming of.  Which changes on a daily basis.  But isn't that part of life?  I hope so.

Don't let your dreams slip away, ever.

MLK

Are there even words to describe what this man did for our nation, and our world?  I don't know if I have them.  Today I watched his infamous "I Have A Dream" speech.  Although Martin Luther King Jr. gave many, many speeches (2500 between 1957 and 1968), this one is the most renowned as well as possibly the most powerful.  There were 250,000 people there, black and white on the day of August 28, 1963.  This was almost unheard of.

Every year on this day I try to listen to this speech, and every year it makes me cry as well as give me goosebumps.  Not only was Dr. King an inspiring public speaker, he was an ambassador of peace.  He knew exactly what needed to change and in fact, knew how it needed to be changed.  I only wish I had been there when he had given this speech.

But I have to wonder, would I have been there, or even listened if I had been alive in 1963?  My parents were, but were in high school and college.  They told me they didn't even know about it until after it happened.  But would I have gone?  Would I have listened?  Would I have been inspired as I am today? It all depends.  I guess we can't say, as people, "I would have done this."  If I had been raised by open-minded parents, perhaps I would have been there.  Maybe, I would have been raised by pro-segregationist parents, and thought nothing but the worst of Dr. King.  All I can hope is that I would have supported the Kings and their mission of freedom.

The line that struck me the most in the speech was this:
"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."

Any and every parent that heard this part of the speech must have been able to identify, right?  I am not a parent, but know that the love of a mother and father is one that is undeniably the most powerful in the world.

I think that's what Dr. King wanted everyone to see.  We are all the same.  We are all people, even though we may have different hair color, eye color, or skin color.  On the inside we are all God's children, we are all humans, and we all have the right to be equal, in all ways.

Janie and Emmie, continued...

Here is a little video of Janie and Emmie playing in the snow.
:)

Jane Austen & Emily Dickinson (reincarnated). meow.

Well, it's official.  My transition to cat lady life has been completed.

Let's start from the beginning.  Ever since I was a teeny tiny little girl I have always loved cats.  I don't know why cats have such a bad reputation- they're so sweet and loving.  They can feel energy and instantly react to it.  I got my first cats when I was in kindergarten.  I wanted a kitten so badly it was all I asked for for Christmas.  When I walked upstairs on Christmas morning, and I will never forget this, two little black and white kitties popped out of a basket with ribbons around their necks.  I named them Sweetie and Sassy.

Sweetie and Sassy lived until last year (I am 22 now, you do the math).  They were murdered by coyotes in our backyard.  But that's a different story.

I decided I wanted a kitten last spring.  I knew I would be living in a house and wanted a companion.  I asked my roommates if a kitten would be alright.  They gave me the thumbs up and the search began.  I looked everywhere until I found a precious little orange tabby in the same town as my lake house.  This particular litter of kittens was born to a 7 month-old kitty, a mere baby herself, and were found stranded on the side of the road in a box in the pouring down rain in rural Arkansas.  Break my heart, will ya?

When I went to visit (they were living with foster parents) and get a feel for the kitty-cat, I fell in love with another one.  That's right, I went from one kitten to two in a matter of minutes.  Number two was not listed on the website and was a precious tortoise shell beauty.  Plus, they say a kitty needs a buddy for when you aren't around.

So I adopted Jane Austen and Emily Dickinson.  Known on the streets as Janie and Emmie.  Like her namesake, Emmie is quite antisocial and would rather be left alone.  She is smart but doesn't let you know it until she sneaks around behind your back.  Janie is a talker and is missing several teeth, some of her big teeth just never came in.  She loves to cuddle and purrs quite loudly.  She would rather be around a person than alone with Emmie.

Here are my precious girls:

Emmie the day I got her!

Emmie and her mommy :)

Janie on her first day!

Mommy and Janie

We love to cuddle!

They were so little!  Emmie loves to give Janie kisses.

My Janie.

My Emmie.

How precious!

Emmie hiding...

Emmie hiding again... She does this often.

Hello.

Dead asleep.

This is Janie's favorite sleep position.

Hi!

Emmie's FAVORITE *sarcasm* outfit.

Janie is a ballerina!

This is how they wait on me to come back from class!  It makes my heart smile!

Janie is my person bodyguard.

Who says cats don't like water?

"What?  I'm not doing anything..."

This is what I wake up to every morning.  Janie likes to get under the covers and cuddle.

So you have met Janie and Emmie, formally.  I can't tell you how many hours of every day I spend with them.  But here's the deal, I'm an equal opportunity animal lover.  I plan to get a puppy one day when the time is right.  All animal lovers know this to be true: when nothing is going right, your pet still loves you unconditionally.  When I am having a horribly awful no good day (remember that book?) and I have been torn to pieces by teachers or grades or mean people or whatever, I can come home and Janie and Emmie will love me like crazy.  And let me know it.  Their compassion is unbelievable.  They can feel it when I'm sad or mad or happy.  Sometimes, when I'm upset they cuddle up next to me when I cry.  They let me hold them when they know I need a hug.  They are just the best.

So here's where I go off the deep end in cat world.  Let me just say, though, that there are PLENTY of people who are absolutely nutso when it comes to their dogs.  For example, I have a neighbor who walks her dog in a baby stroller.  WHAT?!?!

The other day I spent $300 on a new litter box.  Sad, but true.  Here's the thing: it flushes itself.  No more litter and no more stinky.  I love Janie and Emmie, just not their stinky poo.  Now I can love all of them! Plus, whenever I'm home my parents discuss (bitch) the smell.  So far, the CatGenie seems to be working well, no problems.  Besides the fact that Emmie hissed at the yesterday and today.  I think it makes her nervous.  At least I don't have cat DVDs for them to watch while I'm in class- I'm totally serious, the people I got them from had them.

So there you have it.  The amount of money I spend on my precious babies is a little out of control sometimes, but I can't help it.  I just love them!

Just imagine how bad I'll be when I have children...